I am Worthy of a City Like Evanston!

This summer, June 2015, will mark our family's four year anniversary moving to Evanston and what a wonderful four years it has been. (I know it's early to write about summer, but a girl has to dream!) That's our Penske rental truck in the photo above filled with everything we owned upon arrival!

Moving to a new city without jobs and only one friend is a huge risk for any individual, let alone a family to take, but we had a hunch our new city would reward our courage. What we didn't realize is just how big of a reward Evanston would provide each of us.

Our two children (often referred to as roommates who don't pay rent) made wonderful friends both at school and in the neighborhood. Some friends are still around after four years but thanks to the ebb and flow of new citizens, they've both made plenty of new friends every year. That is a huge gift. They enrolled in amazing schools that offered extra curricular activities to support their sports and creative needs and in those schools they are supported by teachers and staff who welcomed them openly regardless of their newness. 

My husband and I have made friends, not as quickly as neither of us play organized sports or joined knitting clubs, who will be friends for life and we continue to make new friends both at work and in our neighborhood. After pretty significant searches we are both able to find means of income in our city, not having to commute more than 15 minutes on a bike. 

The list of benefits could go on but the truest benefits have been the friendship and connections that have come so easy in Evanston because the people living here are warm and open and excited to engage in the community they live in. 

This past year I've started many blog posts in an attempt to recognize this milestone and to thank the people of Evanston who have made us feel welcome. Tonight after watching a TED Talk, it's finally evident what my deepest feelings are about our move and that is "My family is worthy of living in a city like Evanston." Not my family "deserves" or my family is "owed" but my family is worthy and by that I mean the following; we are worthy of friendly neighbors willing to get to know the new people on the block regardless of how we look or how big or small our house is, we are worthy of a walkable city that provides resources like a robust public library and public transportation supported by the tax dollars of a giving community, we are worthy of an engaged City Government that polls citizens and answers emails and phone calls, we are worthy of a beautiful lakefront that is public and manicured and shared with everyone, we are worthy of a diverse community that supports artists and teachers and entrepreneurs alike and we are worthy of a community who opens its doors and hearts to newbies when they have lived here since 1904.

I am grateful for the City of Evanston and filled with joy that my family chose to live here. Watch this TED Talk featuring the great work of Brené Brown and hopefully you will feel the same way about where you are living now or where you choose to live next.

11 Things I Learned About ME after Being Married to Dave Ford for 11 Years

Today is my wedding anniversary. 11 years ago Dave Ford and I were married in a small Episcopal church, Saint Alban’s in Central El Paso (I could see it from my bathroom window), by Father Louie. Father Louie was a nutjob of a priest, from England, who lived outside of Las Cruces, New Mexico, on several acres of land that he dedicated to saving abandoned animals of all kinds. He is dead now; our second son is named after him and several other awesome versions of the name Louis from relatives and friends.

I can safely that after 11 years of marriage the one thing I have become a total expert on is ME. When you spend every minute of every day of every year with the same human, experiencing endless amounts of experiences together, you get a fulltime commentator on your behavior and reactions to your life. In REAL time. (Of course this is assuming you’ve married an honest human.)

Instead of posting about how much I love my husband (barf) and how awesome our marriage is (it better be, considering how hard we work at it) and how I grow every day in my love for him (more like my love of wine), I thought I would post 11 Things I Learned About ME after 11 Years of Marriage, which is so much more my speed. (And of course I've learned more than 11 things about ME in the last 11 years but the number had to match the anniversary!) Here goes;

1. There are numerous facts about simple things (i.e. the temperature that water boils) that never stuck to my brain, making it essential that I raise children with a partner who has a brain that holds facts.
2. I am a connector.
3. I am a collector of experiences not things.
4. Moving and geographical exploration is in my DNA.
5. Physical activity is essential for my spirit.
6. Water is something I need to live by in order to feel connected to the earth.
7. I love meeting new people.
8. In new social situations, I ask more questions than I answer.
9. Fast and furious is my speed.
10. I’m a great teacher.
11. I’m a consistent and disciplined mother.

Now of course you probably expected that list to include a few more negatives than all those positives but I attribute my positive self-awareness to the genius choice I made in my life partner Dave Ford. My husband is a very honest man, who keeps it real at all times. And although I truly believe he loves me more than ice cream and pizza, I also believe that he loves me honestly and isn’t afraid to always provide me honest reactions to my life and my life decisions. Plenty of people surround themselves with “yes” people and people that adore them blindly. But I’ve got a hunch that if you are going to work with someone for a bunch of years through a bunch of experiences, the basis for that partnership should be honesty and real-ness.

I texted Dave this morning that marrying him was and still is one of the “best decisions of my life” and I meant it, for real.